We live with, deal with, autism on a daily basis. In the last few weeks, it has been in my face sort of "front and center" quite a bit. I usually have to back up from it at times because it becomes overwhelming. I can talk about it for hours if I have to, especially if someone needs me, but I'd rather not.
There are several schools of thought; several different ways of thinking about autism these days. I'm glad that some of the discussion is being led by auties themselves. Shouldn't they have a say in how they want to be perceived?
I read a blog yesterday from a mom that went on and on, at length, about whether her daughter "had autism," was "autistic," or was "living with autism." The terminology was very important to her, but I got lost in her definitions. I really don't want the people in my life struggling to find the politically correct phrase in order to not offend me. Their heart and their intent are more important to me. If something is said that is incorrect or reveals a misconception, I may speak to educate, but I don't want others walking on tiptoes around us.
One way of thinking is the cure/recovery. Many dollars are being spent in research to find a cure. The thinking is that we have to find a way for this horrible thing to go away. The new buzzword in these circles is recovery. Even more money is spent to find the cause. Not to be overly political, but if a genetic marker was found (and some have been) would it be possible to choose to abort a child if you knew they were going to have autism? Is this money well spent?
Another way of thinking is that people with autism are different. Neurologically different, to be sure, but just different. Some adults living with autism (there I go, choosing a politically correct term) feel that there is nothing "wrong" with the way they are. They are not freaks or mistakes, they are just different. Their brains process information differently. They may need help to navigate the world they are in, but they shouldn't be wiped off the face of the planet.
Some people will say that autism isn't who their child is, but rather it is an outside force that came in, attacked their child, and tortures their child on a daily basis. Others will say that autism is a part of their child; it is part and parcel of who they are. I can see validity in both opinions. I have felt both ways at different times.
When it comes down to it, which side of this debate I am on doesn't really matter. What do Mark and Jonathan think? It is their life; it is their future. How do they want to be perceived, received, etc?
I asked them and they told me, in their own inimitable fashion.
They want to be accepted for who they are, warts and all. Don't you? They need help to make it in the world, just like everybody else. How many of us can truly make it alone? When they look in the mirror, they see themselves, not a label.
I really hope the link to this video works. You don't have to agree or disagree, but I think it's worth watching to start the dialogue. It is one way to view things; through the eyes of autistics themselves. By the way, Mark thought it was cool.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWOwNP9vC6k
